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Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Attack of the Stomach

More from my previous blog...

OOook so it’s been almost a week since my last cigarette (new years day 09 lol) and I don’t know if I’m being paranoid or if what I think I'm seeing is real, but I'm becoming increasingly worried that I'm slowly starting to compensate for not smoking by eating…

People say that your taste buds change after you quit - well it hasn’t been long enough and even a few years back when I quit for 6 months I still saw no difference there but there is this big hooplah about how when you quit smoking you put on weight for 2 main reasons.

  1. You replace cigarettes with food

  2. Smoking keeps your weight down

Now I know that I'm strong and I know that I can quit, cold turkey, no dramas….but if I start putting on weight, call me superficial, but I'm pretty sure I’ll take up smoking again (after having my kids of course, that being the main reason I quit in the first place) and I know that’s a terrible thing to say but it is something that’s bothering me.

For lunch today I decided I felt like subway - nice & healthy. Once I got into the restaurant I had this sudden urge to buy a foot long…I haven’t bought a foot long in over 2 years and even then the reason I bought a foot long was to have half for breakfast then half for lunch - not all at once. Then when it was my turn to be served, I asked for a foot long! (In amidst my dramatic battle in my head I do know that it could be much worse…I could’ve gone to maccas and bought 5 big macs!) Anyway so I finish ordering, get to the counter and she says “any drinks or cookies with that?” so really quickly I think “yeh I want a cookie” so I say “yes please, one chocolate and one m&m”

WHAT?? I ordered two??? Ok so I'm thinking still not THAT bad - one for the drive back to work n one for when I finish eating. Then she says “how about 3 for $2.50” so I'm like oh god “sure, surprise me!!” god dammit what is she doing to me?!?!

Whilst driving back to work, stuffing my face with cookie, I figured that there is probably no point in worrying cuz id just eaten one cookie and half of another (so I have an even amount of cookie to eat after my sub), and I normally feel extremely full and satisfied after just a 6inch sub so chances are I'm not even going to want the other half and ill eat it tonight or something.

I’ve almost finished the first half and I'm not even one teeny tiny bit full………I have a scary feeling I'm going to eat the other half and have had a full foot long for lunch - plus 3 cookies!!!

Another disturbing food-related issue.

Last night at work, after reading a comment from a friend on facebook about peppermint chocolate, I felt like a peppermint flavoured chocolate. That’s innocent enough right? So anyway, on my break I bought a peppermint crisp - I DON’T LIKE PEPPERMINT…but I ate the whole thing anyway. As well as that, for some ridiculous reason, based on a conversation from working on Sunday night, I felt like musk sticks, so I bought a bag.
Now, I don’t mind the occasional musk stick but after I had a few and started feeling sick I realised I didn’t actually feel like a whole bloody bag of them, but what worried me the most - I was holding them like cigarettes and didn’t even realise! It may just be nothing but I'm still going to try and hold it in my memory bank just incase I need to reference back to it.

Oh god I can’t stand it any longer……………I’m going to finish my sub!

Well anyway that’s my thoughts. I’m hoping its nothing and that its just coincidence but I am definitely going to keep an eye on it and if you’re ever out with me and think you may be noticing it too, feel free to tell me “No Betty. You’ve had enough cookies for one day.

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