It all started as a normal morning, I got to work, had my breakfast upstairs in mum's office, then sat down at my desk preparing for a nice, normal day of work.
I had been sitting at my desk for all of 5 minutes when it started...THE PLAGUE...
I saw something outside that caught my attention so I walked over to the front door to take a look when inside the building on the floor next to the door I saw a half dead moth flailing around...Now just a quick update for those of you that don't know me – I HATE MOTHS...I am absolutely petrified of them!!!!! So anyway that moth was half dead so I knew it wasn't going to attack me so I quickly got my spray (I always keep it close by) and I drowned the bastard.
After I was certain it was dead, I had forgotten what I originally wanted to see outside so I started walking back towards my desk...when I saw it – ANOTHER MOTH!!! And this one was a biggen! So I ran to my desk and called mum........no answer, so I called Ms.A....in she came like a trooper! I gave her the spray and as she was killing that one, I saw another one fly around her and hide in the plant.....I had been taking a phone call at the time so couldn't call out to her to warn her and then by the time I got off the phone it was hiding somewhere and so we assumed it dead from all the fumes in the air as a result of all the mortein. Thanking Ms.A, I noticed that my can was getting a little low on poison so I gave mums phone another call to ask her to bring me some from stock. She still wasn't answering but just as I was hanging up I saw another moth! I wasn't sure if it was the same one or another one so I just sprayed at it again......now for me to do this is pretty tough – im so scared and for some reason when im trying to kill them they fly at me on the attack!!! As I could no longer get through to Ms.A I had to do it myself....just then, the phone rang...."holy shit" I thought, "im going to have to talk to someone in a calm voice and be off my guard..." luckily, it was only mum.... "You called me twice, what did you want?" "There's another moth mum.......and bring more spray!!!!!"
By this stage I was starting to panic! I had just fought off 2 killer moths by myself, Ms.A had killed one for me and then all of a sudden an ugly looking cockroach was starting to crawl under the front door!!!"
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING TO THIS PLACE?" I screamed...I was getting really hot under the collar and a lil sweaty around the arm pits but I kept my cool because mum came to the rescue....
But just when I thought it was Ok...just when I thought mum would kill this moth and I could go back to normal....I WAS WRONG....Another 5 just suddenly appeared out of no where! And they were big fuckers – angry too!! So there's mum standing near the coffee table and lounges with a can of Pea Beau, im standing between my desk and the stairs with my can of Mortein and they're coming at us left right and centre....I was so freaking scared I couldn't take it any more.....Just as I went to bolt up the stairs Handy Man came in, saw all the commotion and offered to help. Handy Man was killing em with his bare hands – it really was a battlefield....for every one that we killed another 2 or 3 would appear.
We killed off about 30 – 40 (and im not exaggerating) and it seemed as though the coast was clear...but every time I tried to calm down and sit back at my desk one or two would appear.............I was soooo scared and I got really hot and sweaty I was that scared! I couldn't stay there, it was just awful.....it was like the calm before the storm.......Mum and/or Handy Man or whoever was on Moth Patrol with me would leave – trying to get some of their work done, I would stand there with the pea beau trying to calm myself down....telling myself that we killed them all and that it was all OK, I would finally reach a centre of calm within myself, start slowly walking to the desk to sit back down when they would come out again!
Honestly – I can only think of 3 explanations for this!
- They had an army waiting inside and outside the fort waiting for me to be alone and let my guard down.
- They were robot moths and didn't die and we were just trying to kill about 30 of the same creatures
- IT WAS A PLAGUE! GOD HATES ME AND HAS SENT A PLAGUE TO BREAK ME DOWN!
I honestly feel it's the latter....but why? Why god why? I was so terrified...I felt so physically sick I thought I was going to vomit....
I went upstairs to Boss and I just said "I can't take this any more. I need to sit somewhere else or im going to have to go home" I was in tears and I couldn't breathe. I have scratches all over my neck and arms from where I was just freaking out.....it was fucking terrible.
So Boss organised for the IT guy to set up my account on someone else's computer (while she's on leave) and I transferred the phones to this desk...I am now no where near reception or the killer moths....I feel much better now – although after all this excitement I am a little worn out and have a bit of a headache but hopefully I should be OK...for now.....
One thing I am worried about though is tomorrow....What happens now that I am not there to protect my office – those moths will start accumulating and hanging out in reception, I wont know they're there so they wont be killed and they'll hide there till I arrive at work tomorrow and they'll attack while im un prepared...Because of my bad memory I will probably have forgotten all about it by the time I arrive tomorrow.....although you know what? Somehow I don't think I will forget....It was pretty terrible... I just need to suppress this memory and try to move on with my life and hope to god that I do not need to go into battle again tomorrow.
I may need to get another job if this keeps up – one that is secure from creatures of the outside world.....................
0 Reader Repsonses:
Post a Comment